I do believe it's high time for an update on Zoe's sleeping habits, if the frequency with which I'm still receiving e-mails on that score is any indication. It's amazing how much research is out there, how many different opinions there are about how a baby should sleep and how to make it happen.
However, that being said, I've decided I need to ignore most of it.
Please don't think I'm ungrateful; I got so many thoughtful and incredibly helpful tips and tricks from the sisterhood of mamas out there and I'm so, so thankful for those of you that took the time to write and share your experiences.
But I was starting to get obsessed, quite frankly. At any given time there were at least six or seven tabs open in my browser, each for a different website promising a different magic bullet. I was stressing myself and Zoe out, trying to fit her into one schedule or another, getting totally frustrated when she didn't do what that particular author said she would. I shared my concerns with some of the other mamas on board a couple weeks ago, and one of them gently asked me a question that smacked me right upside the head.
Have you prayed about it?
And I hadn't. It hadn't even occurred to me that the God who has directed my footsteps down so many intricate paths would be interested in guiding me in this. It's all well and good to pray about how long we should stay on the mission field, but somehow it seemed a little weird to me to ask him whether I should let my baby cry it out.
Except it's not weird. It's the rightest thing in the world. He made her. He knows her so much better than I do, right down to the number of silky little hairs on her head. He knows what she needs, and, maybe a little more importantly, He knows what I can handle. So when she's awake at 4:30AM, singing at the top of her lungs yet again, it's okay. I haven't failed her, and I'm not going to die of exhaustion, despite all indications to the contrary.
I'm not trying to sound all super-spiritual here, but praying about my daughter's sleep has been one of the best decisions I've made as a parent so far. (We're not quite five months in, and I'm hoping I'll have some even shinier moments down the road a ways, but this will do for now.)
Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.
She still wakes up in the night to eat once or twice. She still has random moments where she thinks she's an operatic soloist in the pre-dawn hours. Some of her naps still last precisely forty-five minutes. But overall? Overall, things are so much better.
She can now put herself back to sleep with just a few minutes of fussing, provided she's not hungry (or determined to hit that high note). If she's hungry, forget it; nothing you can do will dissuade this child from eating when she's decided it's time. She takes at least one nap that's an hour and a half long every day; it was like a switch flipped on New Year's Day and she slept for an hour and forty minutes straight for the first time ever. I've figured out how long she can be awake before she needs to sleep, and the end result is that I can put her in her crib wide awake, pop in her soother and walk away while she falls asleep without a peep. Last week I got more than five hours of sleep in a row two days running, something that hasn't happened since before she was born.
She's not sleeping through the night, we're still swaddling her within an inch of her life, and I don't do much in a day other than make sure she's napping enough. And things are great. We're both much happier (and so, by extension, is the HoJ) now that I've managed to shut out all the voices telling me that she should be doing things a certain way and listen to the One that actually knows.
Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.
(But I do wish He'd tell me how much longer I have to wait before she'll realize just how awesome it is to sleep for twelve hours straight.)
However, that being said, I've decided I need to ignore most of it.
Please don't think I'm ungrateful; I got so many thoughtful and incredibly helpful tips and tricks from the sisterhood of mamas out there and I'm so, so thankful for those of you that took the time to write and share your experiences.
But I was starting to get obsessed, quite frankly. At any given time there were at least six or seven tabs open in my browser, each for a different website promising a different magic bullet. I was stressing myself and Zoe out, trying to fit her into one schedule or another, getting totally frustrated when she didn't do what that particular author said she would. I shared my concerns with some of the other mamas on board a couple weeks ago, and one of them gently asked me a question that smacked me right upside the head.
Have you prayed about it?
And I hadn't. It hadn't even occurred to me that the God who has directed my footsteps down so many intricate paths would be interested in guiding me in this. It's all well and good to pray about how long we should stay on the mission field, but somehow it seemed a little weird to me to ask him whether I should let my baby cry it out.
Except it's not weird. It's the rightest thing in the world. He made her. He knows her so much better than I do, right down to the number of silky little hairs on her head. He knows what she needs, and, maybe a little more importantly, He knows what I can handle. So when she's awake at 4:30AM, singing at the top of her lungs yet again, it's okay. I haven't failed her, and I'm not going to die of exhaustion, despite all indications to the contrary.
I'm not trying to sound all super-spiritual here, but praying about my daughter's sleep has been one of the best decisions I've made as a parent so far. (We're not quite five months in, and I'm hoping I'll have some even shinier moments down the road a ways, but this will do for now.)
Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.
She still wakes up in the night to eat once or twice. She still has random moments where she thinks she's an operatic soloist in the pre-dawn hours. Some of her naps still last precisely forty-five minutes. But overall? Overall, things are so much better.
She can now put herself back to sleep with just a few minutes of fussing, provided she's not hungry (or determined to hit that high note). If she's hungry, forget it; nothing you can do will dissuade this child from eating when she's decided it's time. She takes at least one nap that's an hour and a half long every day; it was like a switch flipped on New Year's Day and she slept for an hour and forty minutes straight for the first time ever. I've figured out how long she can be awake before she needs to sleep, and the end result is that I can put her in her crib wide awake, pop in her soother and walk away while she falls asleep without a peep. Last week I got more than five hours of sleep in a row two days running, something that hasn't happened since before she was born.
She's not sleeping through the night, we're still swaddling her within an inch of her life, and I don't do much in a day other than make sure she's napping enough. And things are great. We're both much happier (and so, by extension, is the HoJ) now that I've managed to shut out all the voices telling me that she should be doing things a certain way and listen to the One that actually knows.
Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.
(But I do wish He'd tell me how much longer I have to wait before she'll realize just how awesome it is to sleep for twelve hours straight.)